Yea its only been a few hours since I just wrote a post about how Im not feeling this shit. but im backkkkkkkkk. So If you cant tell, Im mad, Im mad as hell actually. WTF. So im feeling a bit insecure about this girl I am dating she’s pretty and shes kinda hot. Big deal right, I’ve been there before but I cant go psycho on her, I dont wnt to scare her. Why would I go psycho you ask? good question. I guess as cocky as I seem I still am insecure about certain things, im not really cocky people just get the wrong fucking impression. What ever they can go and kiss my ass. So She is going to tonight some business dinner bull shit, im kinda threatened by the people at this place not sure as to what these people are like but I’m guessing they are snobby assholes witha lot of cash to throw around. Im not living on the street but Im not out of controll either. I dont know.
I just dont fucking know, I hate when I say that I dont know makes me seem like im a lost case and never know what the deal is. I guess Im so freaked out about this relationship its killing me inside like I dont know what to do or say, Its been going great as a matter of fact well as great as it gets, sex is OK. Not the best but we’re working on it. She;s not a freak at all so I gotta ease up into it. Im trying to take it easy she’s on the pill so I can do my thing w.out much worry, Thats a relief. back to my threatning situation, im kinda scared to loose her, its her big shindig and move to the metropolis and im afraid of loosing her, I really love her and care aobut her, me in love? oh god not again, I keep falling in love with every fucking girl I meet. But its weird that I havent really cheated on her, ok ok shut up, I know you read my last few posts but I dont think I did. Seriously, I havent fucked another chick in a while, I didint even kiss any one. Last night that ebony cutie I was with? no way didnt even tap that, she seemed kinda horny though and wanted to get off maybe but nah, I keep tlakin about this girl over and over with everyone I meet and its pissing people off. Especially the girls as I dont seem to have much friends that are girls anymore. Fuck what am I doing? My chick is so into her new live that I think that its going to dwindle down and im gonna get sthooped. Oh shit, and that would blow cuz as it is I drink alot and have been maybe noticing a problem and I smoke a lot more…stressed a little with this job changing thing Im trying to do and business has been sorta ,umm how should I put it. NOT there. that benz im looking into this weekend I hope I get it, It should keep my mind busy for a while, something else to concentrate my time on rather than this girl. I need to stay busy. I do keep thinking about my ex, and I dont know why. Well I do know why cuz she had a pencil waist and a phat booty. haha… did I just say that?
well back to this girl, shes going out im pissed off, a little upset and threatened but I cant act like a psycho so I got to ease up a little bit. I need a drink and forget about this shit, not text her all night and go home. I feel like an ass, I feel like I should be tapping some though, someone elses so i dont feel so bad about feeling so Homo’ish and feeling bad for myself.
Recent Comments